And then there were the videos of people speeding down the road at 100 mph, while texting and driving.
And that is what I do not understand. I’m confused on the fun in those actions. How can getting so drunk you throw up the whole night be fun? How can going behind your parents backs and sneaking out just for a quick thrill of speeding be enjoyable?
I made a promise to myself a few years ago to never drink, never do drugs, to always follow the speed limit and to keep my phone away so I would not get distracted. My commitment to this promise has not changed, and I still believe that that is the right choice for me.
These choices, which I believe to be the right choices, have someone somewhat isolated me from my friends, fellow students and even my family.
There is no way that I am going to participate in these activities, and I will never change my beliefs on the right choices. And that makes me wonder, will anyone else ever change? Or will I be in a different mindset from my peers for the rest of my life because of my opinions?
I know that majority of people in my life are proud of me for not doing these activities and for focusing on school. But that is not how I feel.
Do you know how hard it is to find someone who hasn’t drank or doesn’t do drugs? And without that connection to majority of my friends and fellow students, I am disconnected. I am not able to understand the hangover they talk about, or the fun activities they have done. I cannot relate at all.
As to clarify, I love going to parties. I love dancing and socializing and having a good time, but I like to do it safely. I have many wonderful friends, but they all do the normal teenage activities. And because of my maturity, I am left out of some group gatherings, and I cannot connect with them the way they all do with each other.
I have heard people saying, “She is so good, so innocent, so mature.” Thanks, but no thanks. I love that people think that about me, but who wants to be friends with the girl who won’t join in on the fun activities?
As my junior year of high school starts tomorrow, I am faced with a question of where my maturity lies. Do I have the maturity level of a teenager?
Though my age says yes, my mind says no. And what happened? Did I fall behind, or more likely, did I speed up? Did I just skip the stage of needing to do those actions to feel happy? And why am I so different from the rest of my high school class?
Feel free to answer these questions for me, I really am looking for answers. I want to know why I am so different, why I cannot connect and why people feel the urge to be part a of reckless activities.
So with this being said, I leave with one more question; Am I a teenager yet?